The years of Harry Potter

I just returned from seeing the final Harry Potter film.  I know that everyone keeps saying this, but it really is the end of an era.  It's at least the end of an era for me.  I feel like I can somehow link all of the significant moments of my life in the last 10 years to something Harry Potter related.   I could write 50 pages on that but I won't.  Suffice to say, a lot has happened in 10 years and I will miss my time in J.K's world of magic.

I was in college dealing with a break up when I read the first couple books.  I listened to the entire fourth book on an elliptical.  I waited in line at Borders in the middle of the night for the fifth book.  I saw the first movie as a bootleg in a friends living room in Russia where one man translated the entire movie into Russian while you still heard the English spoken underneath.  I listened to the sixth book while I had walking pneumonia as a  Kindergarten teacher in Watsonville.  I bought the seventh book in my first weeks of graduate school and didn't do any homework until I finished reading it.  I cried when Dumbledore died and rejoiced at the moment I learned of Snape's innocence.   I made these characters a part of my life through the books as well as the movies and today I sat by myself in the movie theater during a time of great change in my life and I am not ashamed to tell you  I will miss having this little bright spot to look forward to every couple of years.   I found myself sort of twisted up as I felt the movie coming to a close.  I was, of course, wrapped up in the story but also so sad to see it end.  I have truly fallen victim to the mania that surrounded this series and after 10 years of it I am pretty grateful.  Even though I was a young adult when I first met Harry Potter, I do feel as if we grew up together.  I love the idea that help will always be given to those who ask for it (or those who deserve it).  I love that it doesn't matter where we came from, the magic will find us.  I truly hope love can protect us from evil and most of all I desperately hope that killing that ugly evil growth inside myself will not destroy me entirely.   Good, evil, nature, nurture, etc....Harry Potter followed many life themes and definitely resembled some dark moments in history but in the end it was really nice to have a hero.  I will miss you, Harry Potter. 

Beginning

A not so good friend of mine often blogs about the ins and outs of her life and while I don’t really know this woman all that well I have come to enjoy her fun loving stories about how she came to be a single woman in her thirties with 5 pets in a small apartment, or how she deals with the tragedies and turmoils she faces each day.  I am always touched by the small details she reveals to the hundreds of people who take the time to read.  I am often in awkward places when I come across these stories and I find it helps me work through some of the horrible positions I find myself in.  I recently read one of her entries while I sat in the SFDPT waiting for a boot removal.  It was bright spot in dark hour if you will.   I like to think that the doling out of her life experiences in a public forum and knowing that I am there to receive the information and be comforted by it brings her some sense of satisfaction.  So, here I am in a moment of great change in my own life and I find the need to tell whoever wants to listen about my feelings. 

Basically, I am in  my early 30's, single, and attempting to build a new career in some form of production.  I have tried a lot of different roles on lately and I just can't seem to find where I fit in.  I know that it is not necessary that I absolutely love my job but I guess there is a selfish part of me that feels that since I don't get to have a partner of any kind to help me through this life, I should at least love my work.   I also figure that with the amount of debt going to school has put me in, I deserve some sort of relief in my day.  I think that might happen if I had a full time job with a little bit of stability in it.  Anyway, the point of this blog is not to complain about my job, or my friends, or boast about myself.  I just need to feel heard (or read in this case) during this time of great change and ultimate confusion.  I have been keeping a journal for years and I think it might be nice to share some of my entries from the past as well as those that come up in the future.  

 I should warn you that I am not a writer and I am definitely a little bipolar in my thinking.  I contradict myself all the time and if you play a significant role in a humorous, upsetting, or interesting experience, you may find yourself (nameless) included in an entry or two.  

Thanks for reading.  Please come again.