Beginning

A not so good friend of mine often blogs about the ins and outs of her life and while I don’t really know this woman all that well I have come to enjoy her fun loving stories about how she came to be a single woman in her thirties with 5 pets in a small apartment, or how she deals with the tragedies and turmoils she faces each day.  I am always touched by the small details she reveals to the hundreds of people who take the time to read.  I am often in awkward places when I come across these stories and I find it helps me work through some of the horrible positions I find myself in.  I recently read one of her entries while I sat in the SFDPT waiting for a boot removal.  It was bright spot in dark hour if you will.   I like to think that the doling out of her life experiences in a public forum and knowing that I am there to receive the information and be comforted by it brings her some sense of satisfaction.  So, here I am in a moment of great change in my own life and I find the need to tell whoever wants to listen about my feelings. 

Basically, I am in  my early 30's, single, and attempting to build a new career in some form of production.  I have tried a lot of different roles on lately and I just can't seem to find where I fit in.  I know that it is not necessary that I absolutely love my job but I guess there is a selfish part of me that feels that since I don't get to have a partner of any kind to help me through this life, I should at least love my work.   I also figure that with the amount of debt going to school has put me in, I deserve some sort of relief in my day.  I think that might happen if I had a full time job with a little bit of stability in it.  Anyway, the point of this blog is not to complain about my job, or my friends, or boast about myself.  I just need to feel heard (or read in this case) during this time of great change and ultimate confusion.  I have been keeping a journal for years and I think it might be nice to share some of my entries from the past as well as those that come up in the future.  

 I should warn you that I am not a writer and I am definitely a little bipolar in my thinking.  I contradict myself all the time and if you play a significant role in a humorous, upsetting, or interesting experience, you may find yourself (nameless) included in an entry or two.  

Thanks for reading.  Please come again.